Monthly Archives: April 2005

In the words of Bill the Cat – Ack! Plbbt!

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Well, this morning, I woke up and felt really rested. As I was going through the steps of waking up I thought to myself: “Self, it is pretty bright in the room, what is going on?”

That is when I put on my glasses and looked across the room at my clock.

. . .

Thinking to myself: “Self, that can’t be right. Look at the clock again.”

*looks at clock again*

Ack! Plbbt!

It was 6:15!!!!!!!*

So I managed to get showered, get my teeth brushed, and get dressed in 15 minutes with about 1 liter of adrenaline coursing through my system, I however, did not have time to shave so I am extra fuzzy today.

Amazingly, I did make it to work on time, without having to bend or break any laws of physics.


* Normally I get up at about 5:30 to give myself plenty of time to wake up, get ready for work, and have a cup of tea or coffee before starting my day.

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Dump email, smoke dope: The smart choice

OK…… According to University of London researchers, smoking a joint is less damaging to your IQ than emailing and text messaging.

And I quote:

Apparently, ‘doziness’, lethargy and difficulty in focusing hit ‘startling levels’ – and that’s just for the workers. Despite the remarkable similarity to the conditions experienced by most stoners, the IQ hit for workers is much higher.

Survey respondents sacrificed 10 points of IQ throughout the day compared to the stoner’s loss of four. Emails along with text messages exhibited a drug-like grip over the survey respondents, disrupting their current work in order to answer them. Work productivity suffered overall with most people unable to resist answering incoming messages. In fact, the cost of all of this juggling throughout the day is judged to be the equivalent of losing a night’s sleep.

The study, bizarrely enough was sponsored by HP. I know things have been a bit rocky since their little ray of light Carly got the heave-ho, but is this the way to go? So what is HP trying to tell us – smoke more dope, ignore the phone, don’t answer your emails and switch off the mobile monster in your pocket? While I can appreciate the life-enhancing goal, I’m not convinced the investors in this multi-billion dollar IT company are going to soak up all that positive chi. I’m pretty sure the switch from servers to smoker’s snacks is not going to boost that bottom-line. In fact, those investors could probably do with something to steady their nerves these days.

You know, I can’t even make up stuff this good.

A few things. . . .

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First of all.  Mr. Milholland, thank you for making a strip that makes me stop and think as well as laugh my ass off at times.

When Choo-Choo Bear Dreams


I was blasted from my sleep 45 minutes prior to when I normally wake up this morning.  By a very confused and lost hispanic man who mistook my duplex for the address where his friend lives.  Of course, he was on the wrong street and off by a block or two.  *sigh*  And this has proved to me that if you don’t use something on a regular basis, you start to loose it. and in this case it is the Spanish language.

I grew up in Texas and when I was younger and not wrapped up in work all the time, I was pretty proficient in Spanish.  To the point that if you had taken me and dropped the 22 year old version of me somewhere in rural Mexico, I could have communicated, and done pretty good.

No longer.

I had to really work to communicate with this gentleman, and I really am not happy with myself about that.  What is wrong with me that I can’t keep a language in my head unless I use it all the time. 

So, I guess it is time for me to start studying Spanish again.  I am really ticked with myself in letting it slip.


I will say though, that when I am yanked from my sleep at 4 something in the morning by someone honking their horn over and over to get my attention, that my first thoughts are not kind ones.

Gentleman in Car: Honk, honk, honk, honk, honk, honk, honk, honk, honk, honk, honk, honk, honk, honk, honk, honk, honk, honk, honk, honk.

David in his PJs: *opens front door and sees what is going on* Grrrrrrrrrrr.

Gentleman in Car: Honk, honk, honk, honk, honk, honk, honk, honk, honk, honk, honk, honk, honk, honk, honk, honk, honk, honk, honk, honk.

David in his PJs: *Begins chanting an invocation to Great Cthulhu who lies dead but dreaming in R’lyeh.*

Gentleman in Car: Honk, honk, honk, honk, honk, honk, honk, honk, honk, honk, honk, honk, honk, honk, honk, honk, honk, honk, honk, honk.

David in his PJs: *watches as Great Cthulhu arises from a rift in the street and drags both the man and his car screaming and honking back to R’lyeh* And that is what happens when people wake me up early and put a cloud on my otherwise sunny disposition.


Now for all of my friends with Harry Potter fetishes . . .

I give you the newest magazine to grace the newsstands!

Ladies and Gentlemen . . . Playwitch!


Today became interesting when a customer called in with the following problem. 

One of their most important servers that their most important and biggest customers are on was having performance issues. 

After about two hours of troubleshooting and code review, I found the issue.  A COM+ control with a really nasty memory leak. 

Customer: “Well, I guess we should roll that one back then.”

David: *blinks* “Beg Pardon?  When did you roll this out?”

Customer: “Oh, yesterday.”

David: *thinking quietly to himself* [And why didn’t you tell me this when I asked you what has changed?]


And finally, we are deploying devices for another customer and linking their network with ours – and I have to take my hat off for their previous System Administrator.

The servers are named:

Odin – Domain Controller
Frigg – Domain Controller
Thor – Firewall
Loki – Security Honeypot
Freya – Web Server
Frey – Web Server
Tyr – Web Server
Heimdall – Web Server
Hod – Application Server
Balder – Application Server
Sif – Application Server
Forseti – File Server
Bragi – File Server
Urd – SQL Server
Verdandi – SQL Server
Skuld – SQL Server

You know, everyone should be allowed to have that much fun designing their network and infrastructure.

OK, Now I have seen everything.

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On my way into the office this morning, I came upon the most amusing thing I have seen in a long, long, time.

As some people know, my office is near the “Las Colinas Mustangs

Well, this morning O’Connor Blvd was blocked off by the Irving Police Department. Why you ask? Because there was some big Secret Service thing going on. There were *hundreds* of Secret Service people in the square and wandering out into the street. So, I guess it was a good thing to block off the street otherwise part of the government might be “downsized” by SFW drivers.

But that was not what was amusing. What blew my mind was the fact that there was a REAL LIVE BLACK UNMARKED HELICOPTER hovering over the square!

I *so* wish I had put my camera in the truck.

It is official, reality is FAR stranger than fiction.

Oh yeah, take that Sony!

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Here we have the ultimate answer to Evercrack’s /pizza command:

Now you can get your panda and eat it too!

And the in-game menu is great!

*dies laughing*

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Oh that is just WRONG!

Ladies and Gentlemen, the iCopulate

Only with this tool can you get iPod on iPod Data Transfer Action!

EDIT: You know, this brings a whole new meaning to their saying of “Send us your action shots!”