I miss my Mom

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Being in the house tonight is hard.

Ate dinner and went to the back, went into the guestroom – Mom used to use it when no one was coming to work on different projects.

There on the desk are her glasses that she used for reading. Right where she had taken them off and left them so she could find them again. And I could smell just the faintest whiff of her perfume.

G*d I miss my mother.

I don’t know how much of this is just being in the house, what I have had to do all weekend, or backlash from the funeral.

I want to just be able to sleep and not dream. Unfortunately the dreams keep coming.

Why do I feel as if my whole world is completely out of control and about to come apart at the seams?

I am not sure how to describe what I need but I need it soon.

It is even harder to sit at the computer desk using a system that I built for my parents to upload all of my thoughts for this weekend.

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